Losers Fic: Got so Much
Jun. 29th, 2012 05:03 pmTitle: Got so Much
Fandom: The Losers
Pairing: Jake/Cougar
Rating: NC-17
Beta:
cougars_catnip
Warnings for internalized homophobia, wounded boys
Summary: An expanded scene from "Walk a While With Me." The night Jake and Cougar spent in a hotel room in North Carolina, reconnecting
A thank-you porn for
peaceful_sands for all her hand-holding and cheer-leading.
Jake walks alone to check into the hotel, a sixties-style tourist place where the top floor juts out over the row of trinket shops below. He comes out with the key on a big diamond-shaped plastic key-chain, grinning and shaking his head over the tackiness of it.
Cougar gets out of the car, shoulders Jake’s bags and carries them up the stairs, watching Jake’s backside for more reasons than simple appreciation. Looking for a limp, for asymmetry in his walk. The image of Jake in the hospital bed is too close, too real. As soon as the door is between them and the world he drops the bags on the nearest chair and reaches out, needing to touch, to feel. To have Jake solid and alive under his hands.
“Hey,” Jake says, soft like Cougar’s the injured one, the delicate one, but he lets him touch, lets Cougar slide his hands up under Jake’s shirt. “I’ve got you,” he murmurs and tips his head up to kiss Cougar’s forehead.
“Fuck,” Cougar says, “Not again. Never again.” He unbuttons the front of Jake’s shirt, eases it off of his shoulders when he’d rather rip the thing off of him. He needs to see. The scar he felt with his fingers, where something cut along Jake’s ribs since they last touched like this. The rest of Jake’s body, so much thinner than he had been. He needs to see the damage, and see what’s not hurt and Jake lets himself be stripped down and laid out on the bed. He lets Cougar touch him all over, from the fading yellow bruise around his eye to the busted knuckles of his still-healing right hand.
It’s not sexual, not until he’s pulled Jake’s underwear of and Jake teases “While you’re down there…” and Cougar looks down at him, sprawled and precious and his and he bends to suck Jake into his mouth, down to the root. Jake arches up under him, back going off of the bed as he squirms at the sudden sensation of it.
“Oh, Jesus. Jesus, Cougar,” and Cougar has to pull back to smirk. He plucks his hat off of his head and tosses it onto the dresser by the TV.
“Want to fuck you,” Jake says, his cheeks flushed, his eyes bright. “If you want to. I mean, if that’s something you do.”
“Si.” Cougar steps back just far enough to start stripping off his own clothes, shirt and jeans and boots. Jake sits up and slides to the edge of the bed, leans in and kisses Cougar just over his hip-bone, sending a shiver through him.
Cougar can’t meet his eyes, can’t admit that he wants this, Jake inside of him.
“You’ve got—” he starts and Jake looks up and grins.
“Oh, yeah. I’m a glass half-full kind of guy, I was hoping.” Cougar’s not sure what beverages have to do with this, but Jake gets up and rummages in his bag and while he’s busy Cougar pulls a pillow over for under his hips and stretches out on his stomach on the bed, knees parted but not enough to make a slut of himself.
“Oh.” Jake’s voice sound half-stunned and Cougar can imagine the picture he makes. “I. Wow. Just. Like this?” And if Cougar wasn’t so freaked out worrying he’s doing it wrong, he’d have to grin to hear Jake Jensen reduced to single-word sentences.
“God,” Jake says and Cougar startles at the feel of his hand on Cougar’s ankle. “You’re just. Wow, so beautiful.” Those big hands slide up his calves. Steady and strong. Jake settles on the bed between his ankles, slides up so their knees are touching and Cougar spreads a little wider, letting him in.
Cougar turns his face to the side, presses the crook of his elbow over his eyes. His dick throbs against the pillow, and Jake keeps petting his legs, higher each time, until his thumbs brush Cougar’s perineum, the creases under his butt-cheeks, back up again against his hole. His breath catches and Jake mumbles sweet nonsense, calling Cougar pretty and precious, promising gentleness and other things Cougar has never known before, never wanted before Jake.
“Cougar,” Jake calls, and the more insistent tone of his voice draws Cougar out of his hiding. “Cougar, have you ever done this before? On this side of things with a guy?”
Cougar snorts his laughter. “I won’t break,” he promises and Jake swats his ass with his palm.
“Not answering my question, tough-guy.”
“I’ve been fucked,” Cougar assures him.
“Been a while though, hasn’t it?” Jake asks but doesn’t give him time to answer. “Don’t worry. I’ll go slow.”
His warm hands leave then, and when they come back again they’re cool and slick, both thumbs wet and rubbing at the center of him, slowly easing the muscle, pressing in one and then the other as Jake’s hands hold him spread, one, then the other and then both. Twisting and searching and finding the place that makes Cougar press his teeth to his own arm, biting down to silence himself.
He shudders on the bed, his face feeling singed from the heat of his shame that this brings him such pleasure, to have fingers inside of him. If this was another man he’d throw out a curse, a challenge, a barb to move things along, to get a dick up his ass as fast as possible. He needs more but cannot bring himself to ask, cannot taunt Jake into punishing him with it and so he tries to hold back, to wait for what Jake has promised.
“Cougs?” Jake asks and Cougar pushes back against his thumbs, wanton and disgusting but Dios if Jake pulls away he’s not sure if he’ll be able to stand it.
“More,” he chokes out, eyes closed tight and his entire body tense. “Hijo de puta, Jake, more!”
Jake shifts around, pushes Cougar’s knees up, raises his hips higher and lines himself up. Presses in and pulls Cougar back by his hips, a slow steady slide until he bottoms out and Cougar clenches his jaw against the stretch of it, the feeling of being filled and split open. His hips buck of their own accord and then Jake is fucking him, still talking, saying “Thought I’d lost you,” and “Can’t believe you’re out” and “I love you, I love you, I love you,” until Cougar thinks the words might be true.
Finesse is lost to urgency, to the raw outpouring of emotion. Cougar gets his free arm under himself, takes himself in hand and strokes hard. Jake’s thrusts go ragged and out of rhythm and he cries out, a desperate noise as his teeth press down on Cougar’s shoulder, not biting, not quite, and Cougar’s coming hard.
They collapse against each other, Jake’s harsh panting humid on his neck.
Jake rolls off of him, just enough that he’s not crushing Cougar with his weight, and Cougar’s trapped arm appreciates it. Jake pulls out, careful, and gets rid of the condom. He wipes his hand on the bedspread and then stretches out against Cougar’s back again.
“Was that--was it okay?” Jake asks and Cougar hates the insecurity he’s put in Jake’s voice.
He rolls over to face Jake, forces himself to meet the blue of his lover’s eyes. “Es perfecto,” he whispers, though the words try to catch in his throat.
They lay quiet together for a while, sharing space, trading soft touches.
“You coming back with me to Dallas?” Jake asks, hopeful and unsure. The only answer there could possibly be to that is yes.
Fandom: The Losers
Pairing: Jake/Cougar
Rating: NC-17
Beta:
Warnings for internalized homophobia, wounded boys
Summary: An expanded scene from "Walk a While With Me." The night Jake and Cougar spent in a hotel room in North Carolina, reconnecting
A thank-you porn for
Jake walks alone to check into the hotel, a sixties-style tourist place where the top floor juts out over the row of trinket shops below. He comes out with the key on a big diamond-shaped plastic key-chain, grinning and shaking his head over the tackiness of it.
Cougar gets out of the car, shoulders Jake’s bags and carries them up the stairs, watching Jake’s backside for more reasons than simple appreciation. Looking for a limp, for asymmetry in his walk. The image of Jake in the hospital bed is too close, too real. As soon as the door is between them and the world he drops the bags on the nearest chair and reaches out, needing to touch, to feel. To have Jake solid and alive under his hands.
“Hey,” Jake says, soft like Cougar’s the injured one, the delicate one, but he lets him touch, lets Cougar slide his hands up under Jake’s shirt. “I’ve got you,” he murmurs and tips his head up to kiss Cougar’s forehead.
“Fuck,” Cougar says, “Not again. Never again.” He unbuttons the front of Jake’s shirt, eases it off of his shoulders when he’d rather rip the thing off of him. He needs to see. The scar he felt with his fingers, where something cut along Jake’s ribs since they last touched like this. The rest of Jake’s body, so much thinner than he had been. He needs to see the damage, and see what’s not hurt and Jake lets himself be stripped down and laid out on the bed. He lets Cougar touch him all over, from the fading yellow bruise around his eye to the busted knuckles of his still-healing right hand.
It’s not sexual, not until he’s pulled Jake’s underwear of and Jake teases “While you’re down there…” and Cougar looks down at him, sprawled and precious and his and he bends to suck Jake into his mouth, down to the root. Jake arches up under him, back going off of the bed as he squirms at the sudden sensation of it.
“Oh, Jesus. Jesus, Cougar,” and Cougar has to pull back to smirk. He plucks his hat off of his head and tosses it onto the dresser by the TV.
“Want to fuck you,” Jake says, his cheeks flushed, his eyes bright. “If you want to. I mean, if that’s something you do.”
“Si.” Cougar steps back just far enough to start stripping off his own clothes, shirt and jeans and boots. Jake sits up and slides to the edge of the bed, leans in and kisses Cougar just over his hip-bone, sending a shiver through him.
Cougar can’t meet his eyes, can’t admit that he wants this, Jake inside of him.
“You’ve got—” he starts and Jake looks up and grins.
“Oh, yeah. I’m a glass half-full kind of guy, I was hoping.” Cougar’s not sure what beverages have to do with this, but Jake gets up and rummages in his bag and while he’s busy Cougar pulls a pillow over for under his hips and stretches out on his stomach on the bed, knees parted but not enough to make a slut of himself.
“Oh.” Jake’s voice sound half-stunned and Cougar can imagine the picture he makes. “I. Wow. Just. Like this?” And if Cougar wasn’t so freaked out worrying he’s doing it wrong, he’d have to grin to hear Jake Jensen reduced to single-word sentences.
“God,” Jake says and Cougar startles at the feel of his hand on Cougar’s ankle. “You’re just. Wow, so beautiful.” Those big hands slide up his calves. Steady and strong. Jake settles on the bed between his ankles, slides up so their knees are touching and Cougar spreads a little wider, letting him in.
Cougar turns his face to the side, presses the crook of his elbow over his eyes. His dick throbs against the pillow, and Jake keeps petting his legs, higher each time, until his thumbs brush Cougar’s perineum, the creases under his butt-cheeks, back up again against his hole. His breath catches and Jake mumbles sweet nonsense, calling Cougar pretty and precious, promising gentleness and other things Cougar has never known before, never wanted before Jake.
“Cougar,” Jake calls, and the more insistent tone of his voice draws Cougar out of his hiding. “Cougar, have you ever done this before? On this side of things with a guy?”
Cougar snorts his laughter. “I won’t break,” he promises and Jake swats his ass with his palm.
“Not answering my question, tough-guy.”
“I’ve been fucked,” Cougar assures him.
“Been a while though, hasn’t it?” Jake asks but doesn’t give him time to answer. “Don’t worry. I’ll go slow.”
His warm hands leave then, and when they come back again they’re cool and slick, both thumbs wet and rubbing at the center of him, slowly easing the muscle, pressing in one and then the other as Jake’s hands hold him spread, one, then the other and then both. Twisting and searching and finding the place that makes Cougar press his teeth to his own arm, biting down to silence himself.
He shudders on the bed, his face feeling singed from the heat of his shame that this brings him such pleasure, to have fingers inside of him. If this was another man he’d throw out a curse, a challenge, a barb to move things along, to get a dick up his ass as fast as possible. He needs more but cannot bring himself to ask, cannot taunt Jake into punishing him with it and so he tries to hold back, to wait for what Jake has promised.
“Cougs?” Jake asks and Cougar pushes back against his thumbs, wanton and disgusting but Dios if Jake pulls away he’s not sure if he’ll be able to stand it.
“More,” he chokes out, eyes closed tight and his entire body tense. “Hijo de puta, Jake, more!”
Jake shifts around, pushes Cougar’s knees up, raises his hips higher and lines himself up. Presses in and pulls Cougar back by his hips, a slow steady slide until he bottoms out and Cougar clenches his jaw against the stretch of it, the feeling of being filled and split open. His hips buck of their own accord and then Jake is fucking him, still talking, saying “Thought I’d lost you,” and “Can’t believe you’re out” and “I love you, I love you, I love you,” until Cougar thinks the words might be true.
Finesse is lost to urgency, to the raw outpouring of emotion. Cougar gets his free arm under himself, takes himself in hand and strokes hard. Jake’s thrusts go ragged and out of rhythm and he cries out, a desperate noise as his teeth press down on Cougar’s shoulder, not biting, not quite, and Cougar’s coming hard.
They collapse against each other, Jake’s harsh panting humid on his neck.
Jake rolls off of him, just enough that he’s not crushing Cougar with his weight, and Cougar’s trapped arm appreciates it. Jake pulls out, careful, and gets rid of the condom. He wipes his hand on the bedspread and then stretches out against Cougar’s back again.
“Was that--was it okay?” Jake asks and Cougar hates the insecurity he’s put in Jake’s voice.
He rolls over to face Jake, forces himself to meet the blue of his lover’s eyes. “Es perfecto,” he whispers, though the words try to catch in his throat.
They lay quiet together for a while, sharing space, trading soft touches.
“You coming back with me to Dallas?” Jake asks, hopeful and unsure. The only answer there could possibly be to that is yes.
no subject
Date: 2012-06-29 11:14 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-06-30 01:27 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-06-30 02:49 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-06-30 03:21 am (UTC)And definitely no Max. Something happened somewhere and he's not an issue. One apocafic at a time is enough. :)